Voices
from Silence
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Personal stories of engaging in silence by practitioners from the Global Majority Heritage (GMH) or Black and Indigenous Peoples of Colour (BIPOC) communities.* |
A quarter of the way into the new millennium the reality for many people from this community is that their lives and stories are sidelined. Their voices are silenced.
Although many people from GMH/ BIPOC communities have a spiritual practice of silence, authors from these communities have tended to write more about their experiences of silencing than of their engagement with silence-based prayer.
This new series is a way to bring some voices from the GMH/ BIPOC communities into the conversations and resources about silence on the Seeds of Silence website.
Although many people from GMH/ BIPOC communities have a spiritual practice of silence, authors from these communities have tended to write more about their experiences of silencing than of their engagement with silence-based prayer.
This new series is a way to bring some voices from the GMH/ BIPOC communities into the conversations and resources about silence on the Seeds of Silence website.
September, 2026, Ahmad Wazir:
'Embracing the Void'
Image: Josue Ladoo Pelegrin, Dominican Republic, unsplash.com/@ladoojosue
Ahmad Wazir, Charlotte,
North Carolina, USA |
Listen to Ahmad reading his text, 'Embracing the Void'
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Embracing the Void
I’ve always been somebody who feels the need to fill empty space. Sometimes that means filling the empty space in a conversation. Sometimes it means filling my life with activity. Reading the next book. Learning something else. Working on another project. Helping somebody. Fixing something.
I’m a fixer. I’ve always been the go-to guy. And for a long time, I took a lot of pride in that. Being the person people could call. Being the one who could figure something out. Being useful. Helping people.
But I’ve also had to be honest with myself about the other side of that.
There have been times when I gave so much of myself to other people that I was completely depleted. And I think somewhere along the way I started believing that I had to earn my salt by doing. By helping. By fixing. By being useful.
So sitting still has never come naturally to me.
For years, even the idea of meditation was difficult because it felt like I wasn’t doing anything. If I’m sitting there in silence, my mind is saying, 'You could be doing something.'
And that’s really what I’ve had to start looking at. Because staying busy can make you feel productive. It can make you feel like you’re accomplishing something. But sometimes you’re just keeping yourself busy enough that you don’t have to sit with yourself.
It reminds me of trying to empty a river with a bucket. You can keep dipping that bucket in. You can work hard. You can wear yourself completely out. You can feel like you’re doing something because you’re moving the whole time. But you’re not really accomplishing what you think you’re accomplishing. That has been part of my relationship with silence.
Over the last several years, I’ve had to become more intentional about slowing down. Putting the phone down. Cutting off some of the outside noise. Sitting with my own thoughts. And not following every thought. Just letting it come and letting it go. That sounds simple, but for me it hasn’t always been simple.
For a long time, I think I was avoiding the void.
Now I’m learning to embrace it.
I’m learning that I don’t always need another book. I don’t always need another activity. I don’t always need another conversation or somebody else who needs something from me.
Sometimes I need to sit still long enough to hear myself.
And what I’m starting to discover is that the void isn’t really empty. There’s rest there. There’s creativity there. There are things I probably already know, but I stay so busy that I don’t give myself enough space to actually hear them.
Of course, I still have a family. I have a job. I have responsibilities. I’m not talking about checking out of life. I’m talking about learning that I can’t keep giving and giving until there’s nothing left of me.
This is still a work in progress. But I’m starting to understand that sitting in silence isn’t doing nothing. Sometimes it may be the most important thing I can do. Because it gives me a chance to actually hear myself.
I’m a fixer. I’ve always been the go-to guy. And for a long time, I took a lot of pride in that. Being the person people could call. Being the one who could figure something out. Being useful. Helping people.
But I’ve also had to be honest with myself about the other side of that.
There have been times when I gave so much of myself to other people that I was completely depleted. And I think somewhere along the way I started believing that I had to earn my salt by doing. By helping. By fixing. By being useful.
So sitting still has never come naturally to me.
For years, even the idea of meditation was difficult because it felt like I wasn’t doing anything. If I’m sitting there in silence, my mind is saying, 'You could be doing something.'
And that’s really what I’ve had to start looking at. Because staying busy can make you feel productive. It can make you feel like you’re accomplishing something. But sometimes you’re just keeping yourself busy enough that you don’t have to sit with yourself.
It reminds me of trying to empty a river with a bucket. You can keep dipping that bucket in. You can work hard. You can wear yourself completely out. You can feel like you’re doing something because you’re moving the whole time. But you’re not really accomplishing what you think you’re accomplishing. That has been part of my relationship with silence.
Over the last several years, I’ve had to become more intentional about slowing down. Putting the phone down. Cutting off some of the outside noise. Sitting with my own thoughts. And not following every thought. Just letting it come and letting it go. That sounds simple, but for me it hasn’t always been simple.
For a long time, I think I was avoiding the void.
Now I’m learning to embrace it.
I’m learning that I don’t always need another book. I don’t always need another activity. I don’t always need another conversation or somebody else who needs something from me.
Sometimes I need to sit still long enough to hear myself.
And what I’m starting to discover is that the void isn’t really empty. There’s rest there. There’s creativity there. There are things I probably already know, but I stay so busy that I don’t give myself enough space to actually hear them.
Of course, I still have a family. I have a job. I have responsibilities. I’m not talking about checking out of life. I’m talking about learning that I can’t keep giving and giving until there’s nothing left of me.
This is still a work in progress. But I’m starting to understand that sitting in silence isn’t doing nothing. Sometimes it may be the most important thing I can do. Because it gives me a chance to actually hear myself.
Ahmad Wazir, September 2026.
Ahmad Wazir is a writer, Enneagram teacher, and frontline leader who has spent nearly two decades working in public transportation, currently in rail operations leadership in Charlotte, North Carolina. Through his work with Totem Confidence, he focuses on self-awareness, human behavior, and leadership.
Ahmad's writing and teaching explore identity, relationships, leadership, and the ways we come to understand ourselves and the people around us. Whether through his creative work or his work with frontline leaders, Ahmad is interested in what happens when we become more aware of the patterns shaping how we move through the world. He is still working on sitting still. More about his work and his book, Nobody Prepared You For This, can be found at TotemConfidence.com. On 26th & 27th September Ahmad is co-hosting the latest Contemplative Enneagram Summit from Closer Than Breath. For info & booking click here.
Ahmad's writing and teaching explore identity, relationships, leadership, and the ways we come to understand ourselves and the people around us. Whether through his creative work or his work with frontline leaders, Ahmad is interested in what happens when we become more aware of the patterns shaping how we move through the world. He is still working on sitting still. More about his work and his book, Nobody Prepared You For This, can be found at TotemConfidence.com. On 26th & 27th September Ahmad is co-hosting the latest Contemplative Enneagram Summit from Closer Than Breath. For info & booking click here.
* The terms 'Global Majority Heritage' (GMH) and 'Black and Indigenous Peoples of Colour' (BIPOC) refers to people whose backgrounds are from non-Western, non-White ethnic and cultural groups, reflecting the fact that the majority of the world’s population comes from Africa, Asia, Latin America, and the Middle East. These terms acknowledge the rich heritage of ancient Indigenous communities and challenge the traditional framing of racial and ethnic minorities by emphasizing that these populations are, in fact, the global majority.
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